The four types of felons

I was visiting the Fairfax County courthouse last week with my 14-year-old son's civics class.  One district court judge (who I won't name here because he was addressing the students) was very frank about the kind of offenders he sees in his courtroom. "I'd say only about 15 percent of the people who come before me are actual criminals," he said.  "The other 85 percent either have drug and alcohol problems, are mentally ill, or just made a very stupid mistake."

He then went on to point out that the most of the defendants he sees also have very little education, often not even finishing high school -- a not so subtle reminder to these kids about why they need continue with theirs.

His observations are pretty much in line with national findings. A third of all prisoners in state jails are serving a drug-related conviction, according to statistics from the U.S. Bureau of Justice. Another study by the National Center for Addiction and Substance abuse notes that "drugs and alcohol are implicated in 78 percent of violent crimes, 83 percent of property crimes and 77 percent of other crimes.  In addition, CASA found that 65% of U.S. inmates meet the criteria for for substance abuse .

This also dovetails with what I've seen teaching  inmates.  In fact, when my students are explaining their felony convictions as part of interview practice, one of the most common explanations I hear is "at the time I committed my crime my judgment was clouded by drugs and alcohol."   I also see a lot of obvious mental health issues.  And sadly, I have on a few occasions witnessed a true criminal mindset.

The a reason I bring this up is that in order to put your past behind you it is critical that you know what kind of felon you are. Denial does nothing for you here. You've done your time, you might as well acknowledge why.  There is a difference between stealing money for the sheer thrill of it and doing something because you're not in your right mind.  You're responsible for both, of course.  But if you identify the cause you're more than likely to be able to identify the steps you need to take to put it behind you -- and to make sure you don't repeat it.

So ask yourself, what kind of felon are you?  What's the why behind your crime?  And what are you going to do about it?

Getting a job with a felony -- a success story

I have another class "graduating" today, which means the nervousness has been kicking in.  After weeks of evaluating their strengths and weaknesses, working on resumes and interview skills, many of my students are voicing doubts.  Who's going to hire me with a felony on my record?  Can someone with a criminal background really get a job in the "outside" world? 

The answer, of course, is yes, though it won't necessarily be easy.   That's one reason I'm giving each of them  a copy of the story that follows (and why I decided to excerpt it here.) This particular ex-offender, who lives in Texas, faced down similar fears.  She didn't have overnight success either, but she definitely has the right attitude. She also proves the adage that, if you're willing to put the work in and show that you've changed, it only takes one employer to give you a second chance. 

After 8 years of incarceration and a successful 20 months following my release, I'm still hanging in there and making things happen.  I hardly remember the person I was before, but every once in awhile I catch her riding by in a car or walking past me in the street.  I don't like that girl very much...In fact, I despise her, but I have to think of her from time to time so I won't forget where she was and how far she has progressed.  I actually like myself now...love myself, in fact.  Not a narcissistic type love, but a self respect I that I needed in order to become a productive member of society.

There are no specific answers to why I became a heroin addict, or why I committed the crimes I committed.  For the second and third years of my incarceration when I was finally toxin free and could think clearly, I tried to find a logical explanation for why a college-educated middle class American would become what I had become.  After a while of trying to figure it all out, I realized that I had to just push on.  I could waste the rest of my incarceration or I could make the best of it.  I promised myself that I would not serve an 8-year sentence in vain and that I would use every opportunity available to regain my life and my self-respect.

And hey, it worked!  I'm now employed as a research biologist in a government lab. It was a long shot since I had a violent crime and I was on parole, but I did it.  I knew there would be tons of scrutiny, but all they could tell me was no. "No" never killed anybody right? Don't think I walked right out the prison doors and walked into a swanky made-in-the-shade job. For the first 7 months I had to work landscaping and cutting grass to make ends meet.  I worked two jobs and sometimes 14 hour days, but I knew I couldn't give up.  Even after I got the lab job, I still worked a second job.  I prayed constantly and still do. I cried sometimes and still do.  I get snide comments and probably always will.  People doubt me and probably always will.

None of that matters...because I'm free and if I survived the humiliation of being a drug addict, a thief, a prisoner, a liar, a cheat...Then I can definitely survive and even thrive on the humility one can experience in being a simple, honest, hardworking person.  It's true... I don't drive the fanciest car or always have the money I want.  But I have what I need and it's enough to allow me to go to bed each night with a good conscience.  It's enough to remain free.  It's enough for me.

It's worth noting that this woman ends her story by saying that she thinks the length of her sentence was the key to her success because  it gave her the time she needed to really be willing to change. What do you think? What can you do, or did you do during your sentence to help turn your life around?

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How do you know when you've changed?

I'm teaching the part of my course where we address the $64,000 question:  Have you ever been convicted of a felon?

It's the question that all ex-offenders fear.  The deal-breaker.  The interview-ender.

My counsel is that it doesn't have to be. Not if you answer it truthfully, take responsibility and explain how you're turned your life around.  It's the turning part that's difficult for many of my students.  How can you be sure that you've really made that internal change and you're not going to fall back into old patterns?

In a column in the Philadelphia City Paper, re-entry specialist Justina Fox says she can tell when an offender "is ready to move on."

She introduced the columnist to Rob, who used to burglar unsuspecting college students, but has now become a barber thanks to training he got in prison and she believes, truly changed his ways.   Here's what he has to say:

"I'm in the trust business," Rob says, "where you learn how to care about people. Maybe they don't get the best or sharpest haircut, but I give them honest and good service. When you forget about the money, that's when you'll make it. You live with that every moment of your life. There's not a moment that I can slip and lose consciousness of what I need to do. People will trust you if you trust yourself."

Wise words, I think.

How will you know when you've changed?  Or how did you know?

Gearing up for the New Year

No, this is not going to be a post about New Year's resolutions.  I'll give you a few more days before that.  But in preparation, I wanted to mention Dr. Richard S. Sandor's brilliant book "Thinking Simply About Addiction.   Loyal readers know I'm not one for plugging authors on this blog, but after devouring this gem, and marking passages and pages throughout, I couldn't resist.

And by the way, this book isn't just for those with addictions to drugs or alcohol.  There's some wisdom in here that's applicable to anyone trying to start fresh and resist falling into old patterns of behavior.

Dr. Sandor is  a psychiatrist who's worked with drug addicts and alcoholics for more than 25 years.  He believes addiction is a disease, but not in the way you'd expect.  It makes an unhealthy or compulsive behavior automatic -- an automatism is the word he uses.  This can't be cured or reversed -- if you find that once you start doing a behavior you can't stop, that won't change.  But it can be made dormant, if  you put the work in-- and don't start up again.  It's a two-part recovery.

The big picture is this.  Long after stopping, long after withdrawal and craving have faded, something is still there ready and waiting to be awakened if it's given the opportunity.  An addiction never goes away.  Even after years of abstinence, the automatism is still there.  The solution is not starting again and that belongs in the realm of choice...."

So Sandor suggests being honest with yourself.  There are two reasons people relapse (and these, I might add are applicable to many kinds of  destructive behavior) : 1. They have forgotten the pain and costs,  and 2. They have gotten into such a state of emotional distress that they don't care.

Sound familiar? It should, as all sorts of risky behaviors can and do exert that pull on many of us.  Sandor believes the answer must be found in a spiritual awakening so that no matter how your life is going you retain the humility not to revert to old ways.  Yes, he acknowledges this is tough in our society, where the "capacity to quickly and effectively escape" feelings of pain, fear, boredom and other negative emotions "has never been greater.  And not just through drugs and alcohol -- gambling, eating, sex, exercise, gaming, shopping, thrill-seeking, stealing, etc. --  all these can blot out feelings.

But change is possible. The key, and an idea I like, is the importance of  accepting that suffering is part of the human experience and that it has meaning.  Setbacks can make you stronger, wiser and a better person.  As Sandor notes, attempts to avoid suffering are at best a short-term fix.  "Like it or not, suffering really is inescapable and in time, what was at first an easy way out stops working.  When you begin to understand that suffering is not only inevitable, says Sandor, "but essential for discovering the purpose of human life and consciousness," then you've "begun to move forward from mere abstinence (not engaging in the negative behavior) to true recovery."

Thoughts?  Comments?  Anyone have a strategy that's helped you stay on a positive path?

Transitions and transformations....

                                                    
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."        

----    William Morrow

This quote made me think of someone I've been working with.  She's going to be released next week and we met for the last time today.  

As we talked in a small visitor's room,  I could see two other women being processed into the jail.  The deputies told them to put their money, their bras and other belongings in plastic bags.  One girl stood nervous and mute in a faded sweater and jeans, another, a redhead, sat in a corner chair doing her best to seem in control.  She bantered with the deputy up to the point where she almost got in trouble, wished another lady a cheerful good luck as she was sent to her cell, and generally carried on like she was at a party.

It made me realize how far the young woman sitting across from me had come.  She's spent nearly two years in detention here at an age when many people are still trying to figure out what they're going to do with their lives. She's been shamed, treated well, treated badly, endured discomfort and disappointments and even some happy moments, but most importantly when you talk to her you can tell she's learned -- a lot about the world and herself. I've seen it in the way she's reacted to setbacks and how focused she's become about her future -- and how realistic.  She knows she faces challenges.  She knows she has a lot of work to do and tough times ahead.  But she also has a plan.  Multiple plans, in case one doesn't work out. She's done the research, asked the questions.  She has  family and friends to support and inspire her (and realizes how fortunate that makes her). She also  has a list of agencies and people she's met along the way who are willing to help and she plans to take advantage of it. 

But most importantly, she seems to have the inner resources and the attitude to move forward with her life now.

I wish her -- and everyone in her position -- the best of luck.  Change never happens overnight, but it is possible.  And it's wonderful  to see the transformation.

Is a new identity the answer?

I recently received this question from a reader::

Q: My son has been out of prison for almost a year and a half.  In that time he has applied for jobs everywhere, fast food, construction, retail -- you name it --  but no one will hire him. Every time they do a background check his conviction comes up and he never hears from the people again.  And if he is honest on his application or in an interview, forget it!  No matter how much he tries to explain that he has changed it doesn't seem to work. And all this because of  this for one stupid mistake he made at 21 -- a mistake that HE HAS PAID FOR!   I don't know what he is going to do if he can't find something soon.   A friend of ours says he should get his social security number changed so his record will not come up in the background checks.  My son really wants to do it -- he is so desperate.   I feel we are running out of choices.  Does this even work without changing his name and if so, how can we do it?

A:  I'm really sorry you son is having such a difficult time.  It's a tough job market out there for everyone, and having a record only makes things harder.  I can sympathize with your son's frustration and understand why the idea of starting fresh would be appealing. 

Unfortunately, changing his social security number is unlikely to help him.  Although the government does give  new numbers in cases where  abuse, harassment or identity theft are involved, a) you have to prove it, and b) it can be costly since of your benefits are linked to your social security number. In addition, any new social security number would still be linked to the old one in federal records, which means your son's conviction would still come up in a background search as noted here.    

The only way your son is truly going to put his past behind him is by building a record of work experience and achievement going forward.  You don't mention his skills or  how much education he has, but while he continues to look for work this is where I'd focus. Whether he's looking at getting a college degree, training or certification, there are a variety of grants, scholarships and government financing that can make the cost of these programs affordable, as I've noted here.  If your son is interested in learning a trade like plumbing or being an electrician, apprenticeships offer the opportunity to be paid while he learns.

In the meantime, it might be worthwhile for him  to visit  a reentry organization near where you live, (you can look for one here) or  a One-stop Career Center. These places typically have counselors used to dealing with ex-offenders who might be able to help your son  with his resume or interview skills.  If you belong to a church, he might also consider volunteering there on community-related or other projects.  This would enable him to do something constructive and develop contacts who might be able to serve as references or help him find paid work.

I know this isn't necessarily the answer you were looking for, but I hope this helps. Good luck to you both and be sure and check back to let me know how you're doing.

What women want

                

Do women have a harder time rebuilding their lives after incarceration?  I've been wondering about this a lot lately.  Although I've taught both men and women, for the past several months I've been working primarily  with females -- and the myriad  issues these women face upon release is daunting.  Now before all you guys get on me for being sexist, I'm not saying male ex-offenders don't have it tough too.  Everybody who takes the course I teach  wants and needs to find a job, which isn't easy. But in my women's classes I've also had three students give birth while serving out their terms. Female offenders are more apt  to be single parents or sole-caregivers for children under 18.  They're also more likely than their male counterparts to have been abused, have problems with drug or  alchohol and suffer from mental illness, according to a National Justice Institute study.  On top of that women felons typically have fewer job skills and less work experience. 

Over at Prisontalk.com,  one of the best online communities out there for ex-offenders in terms of real life feedback,  there's a even a running discussion that addresses this topic.  As one poster put it: "Since men can do labor intensive jobs and most of these jobs are a little more forgiving when it comes to having a criminal history, they get more jobs. Most women work in a more structured environment, this tends to mean more corporate jobs, and they are much less forgiving of a criminal history. Unfortunately women are judged much harsher then men. It’s almost like a macho thing, real men are supposed to be bad get into trouble but not women. There are double standards."

So what does all this mean if you're a women trying to turn your life around?  Basically, that you're going to need to be even better prepared than a man  might be.  A 2002 report by the Safer Foundation came up with recommendations to improve the reentry process for women, but in the meantime there is still plenty you can do on your own, including:

1. Get  help early.   Ideally start when you're inside.  Take advantage of whatever educational opportunities you're offered.  Complete your GED.  Take classes. As strange as it sounds, a prison or jail-term often represents the first time some women have been  forced to focus just on themselves.  Use your lack of other responsibilities to work on improving  you.
2. Start building or rebuilding your support network now.  Keep in touch with people who offer positive reinforcement.  For one woman I worked with this was an old  friend who sent her inspirational sayings and a cellmate equally determined to change her life.  Get a mentor to help you get on track to realize future goals, or seek out someone from the prison ministry.  After your release be similarly selective in the company you keep.
3. Get your documents in order.  If you have family/attorney might be able to help you get started.  If not,  reentry and other community organizations are there to help you complete the process of gettting back licenses or helping start the paperwork to regain custody of your children once you've been released.
4. Get the treatment you need.  If you have substance abuse or mental health issues now is the time to deal with them.  As one former offender who got a job and went on to start her own business put it: " This should be your first priority. Period! If you have an addiction, get help. Nothing will screw up your future success faster than dope. If you go to work stoned, drunk or flying someone will notice. Bank on it!"
5. Take advantage of re-entry resources right away.  Many of these organizations require you to report within 24 hours of getting out in order to qualify for benefits such as job assistance and housing assistance, and other types of transitional help.
6. Be patient with yourself.  Women ex-offenders often must contend with everything from reestablishing a home and family life and ending destructive relationships to finding affordable housing, a job and a way to live.  And they must often do this while resisting falling back into addiction or bad habits and making sure they meet the obligations of their parole.  It's a tall order and there will be good and bad days.  Give yourself time as well a  permission not to be perfect.